Thursday, November 18, 2010

Fly Southwest Airlines

If you need to fly, fly Southwest Airlines, when you can. They have always been passenger friendly and you have to love a Southwest exec who actually understands molestation when he sees it.

WSJ reports (My emphasis):
The fear is that Thanksgiving travelers—many of them students, families and older people who fly once or twice a year—will be unfamiliar with TSA procedures and slow to get through checkpoints. Full-body scanners require removal of wallets, belts, jewelry and everything inside pockets.

"With people getting partially molested at checkpoints, all that is going to be a real shock for them," said Greg Wells, senior vice president of operations at Southwest Airlines. "TSA will create an issue for us. It's going to slow things down."

Southwest will have employees with walkie-talkies at checkpoints to hold airplane departures if passengers are stuck in long lines.
Wells is the only official in the airline industry that, to my knowledge, has publicly acknowledged what the TSA is really up to: molestation.

5 comments:

  1. I bet there's a "precedent" here with things the British used to do back before the War (Revolutionary, of course). For all the flag-waving "American patriots" who love this country and especially love comparing things to the War-era, I'd say if you're not 100% outraged by the TSA in general you'd better check your premises. Anyone making excuses for this Wild Bunch is a Royalist, Brit-loving ninny!

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  2. For moral reasons, we contacted SouthWest Airlines two days ago to cancel several tickets for an early December flight. The tickets we purchased were non-refundable, however, we are disappointed that SWA was not willing to grant a refund considering the exceptional, unforeseen and unavoidable nature of the new TSA security requirements. We had purchased the tickets, unfortunately, in mid October only just before the security procedures were made public, and notified SWA immediately when it became clear the TSA was affirming that its conduct toward John Tyner would be directed to any other opt-outs. (sorry if this post gets duplicated, initial submit was as anonymous).

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  3. While you did not get a refund, the total purchase price for each ticket is deposited into a future flight credit that can be accessed by your confirmation number(s) for your cancelled trip(s). If you spent $400 for 4 tickets under the same confirmation number you have $400 in credit. If you spent $400 for 4 individual tickets with four different confirmation numbers then you have 4 $100 credits. Just plan to use these flight credits within a year, when hopefully the nudity scan and fondling your genitals will be long gone.

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  4. Yes, it is true that I can use the funds toward a future flight. However, there are two problems with this (1) It requires waiting on changing political circumstances, which is not likely to happen, (2) QE2 is going to erode the purchasing power of the funds held by SWA. Finally, it is disappointing SWA is going to keep 100% of funds for flights that will never taken. I would be well pleased if they were offering a partial refund in lieu of the relevant administrative expenses, etc,.

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  5. After viewing several videos of these assaults, I notice that the TSA gender-matches the gropers to the passengers. I suggest that anyone who wishes to make their irritation known to the TSA engage the following line of demand:

    Passenger to be Assaulted (to TSA assaulter): "Are you a homosexual?"

    TSA Assaulter (to Passenger (victim)): [whatever]

    Victim: "Because the purpose of gender-matching is to lower to the minimum any risk of prurient sexual interest on your part being exploited against me."

    TSA Assaulter (to Passenger (victim)): [whatever]

    Victim:"Because if you are a homosexual, then your congenital, involuntary, unchangeable sexual orientation defeats the purpose of gender-matching, and exposes me to an unacceptably high risk of prurient sexual exploitation, no different than if I were having my genitals groped and squeezed by a member of the opposite sex."

    TSA Assaulter (to Passenger (victim)): [whatever]

    Victim:"If you refuse to explicitly declare your sexual orientation then I demand the intrusive groping be done by an officer of my own gender who is willing to declare, in a clear tone of voice, that they are not now, publicly or secretly, a homosexual."

    TSA Assaulter (to Passenger (victim)): [whatever]

    Victim:"If no such officer is available, then I demand to redress my grievance to your superior immediately, so that I may avoid being sexually assaulted by a group of closeted homosexual cowards."

    This approach has the charm of being gender-neutral. The political can of worms this exchange could potentially unleash is so multi-valent and vicious-cycling that it has the potential to do far more harm to the TSA's brain-dead adipos-ocracy than any simple "touch your boobs" t-shirt campaign.

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