Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Hillary Clinton's Excellent Adventures

By, Chris Rossini
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When the toil of millions of Americans foot your bills, you'd be a fool not to take advantage of it, right?

At least that's Queen Hillary's motto.

Remember back in 2001 when Hillary became Senator of NY, and it was time to get an office? She picked the most expensive office of all Senators, costing taxpayers $514,149 per year, which was $90,000 more than Diane (I want your gun) Feinstein’s $424,632 pad.

A former First Lady deserves nothing but the best.

Becoming Secretary of State didn't slow Hillary down when it came to guzzling your money either.

No way!

Even though we live in an unbelievable technological age, where you can communicate with just about anyone in the world in seconds, Hillary would take the old school approach. She'd travel the world like no other, breaking records along the way.

The Atlantic fills us in:
During her four years as the nation's top diplomat -- and particularly during her final year in that post -- Clinton fashioned herself as something of a George Clooney of global affairs, spending almost as much time up in the air as she did on the ground.
So while you're instructed to "recycle" and find more "sustainable" ways to live, Her Highness racked up 1,000,000 miles on her plane (956,733 to be exact). And let's not forget that the Pentagon is already the world's biggest polluter.

But that's neither here, nor there.

You get back to rummaging through your trash (like a raccoon) and separate those bottles and plastics.

While you're dumpster diving, Hillary would break Madelene (500,000 dead Iraqi kids are worth it) Albright's record of visiting 98 countries. Hillary would visit 112.

And why not?

If you were going to become Queen of The World in 2016, wouldn't you want to survey your lands and your peoples.

But you're not....You must go to work and earn enough to pay for the lives of your superiors.

And you best figure out ways to make even more money, because come 2016, the cost of carrying the Queen on your back will escalate exponentially!


  1. Great picture, amazing how much she resembles Gorgan the Friendly Angel.

  2. C Northcote Parkinson in one of his funny but true books talked about a method developed to get rid of top executives without actually firing them.

    What he described was to send the executive on a world wide tour of faculties/projects/etc. The tour would be specifically designed to send the executive through as many time zones and climates as possible.

    Smart executives would quickly see the writing on the wall and would soon resign

    Not so smart executives would drag their increasingly weary body from place to place on mind numbing/body destroying travel. Finally with the body weakened (possible sickness/collapse, hitting head/ blood clots) the doomed executive would turn in their resignation.

    I wonder if Obama has read C Northcote Parkinson’s works?